Newton’s First Law states that…
“Every object persists in its state of rest or uniform motion in a straight line unless it is compelled to change its state by an external force applied to it.”

A personal development coach will have told you that…

“Every one persists in his or her own state, unless he or she feels the compelling need to change so as to escape from his or her current state.”

True? Come on. Nod your head along with me.

Newton’s Second Law states that…
“Force is equal to the rate of change of momentum. For a constant mass, force equals mass times acceleration and acts in the direction of the acceleration vector.”

Force = Mass x Acceleration

Brings back memories huh? Again, a personal development coach will suggest that…

“As long as you own a human brain, your success is equals to your mindset times the actions you take. Success acts in the direction of your thoughts.”

Success = Mindset x Action

Pretty neat isn’t it? Let’s move on to the Third Law.

Newton’s Third Law states that…
“For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.”

And it translates to…

“Don’t be afraid of failure and forego the chance to even try. Because for every action you take, there is always feedback.”

If you have done an excellent job, your boss shouts, “Excellent!” Your colleagues give you a pat on your back. That’s excellent feedback. If you performed badly, at least the boos will tell you what went wrong and you decide how to take the necessary corrective actions. Like the old English saying, “Once bitten, twice shy.” I believe in that.

Laws of Motion? Or Motivation?
That’s a lot of wisdom summarized in his three laws. And I thought they were just the usual, boring Physics laws. Simply brilliant. Thanks Newton!

My Life Has Changed For the Better
Since graduation, I have been indulging in personal development (I say “indulging” because I do enjoy it). I swear I’m a hundred times more hardworking than I was during my schooling years. Ask my close friends and family and you’ll know. Oops! You probably won’t know them. Oh well. Anyway, a friend I met up with today told me this, “You have changed for the better, Dan.” Okay. Maybe not exactly that. He spoke in Mandarin. But it was something along that line. Made me feel really good about myself!

Back in my university years, I was hit badly by the “lack-of-purpose-in-life” syndrome. I slept a lot, skipped lessons, photocopied my friend’s lecture notes (filled with his handwritten notes) and tutorials, and arrived late for class tests or quizzes. It was like a routine every semester. Duh. A fantastic “leecher” I was. Not going into my life story here. But basically, he noticed that I have since become more purposeful and self-driven. Woohoo!  

I Think I’m Starting to Influence Others…
Come on. I’m serious. After reading my blog and listening to my aspirations, the same friend whom I used to borrow lecture notes from met up with me today to discuss about starting an educational website together. Though he was a motivated individual to begin with, my high level of motivation must have rubbed off on him right? Tell me I’m right. *grins*…

Even my sister seems to have softened up a bit. She used to be kind of negative, to an unbelievable extent it was actually funny. Now, I can see some positive spark in her every now and then. She’s mad about the Korean language. And Korean guys. Any tall, handsome Korean guys reading this blog? Drop me an e-mail soon will you?

A Little Side Story
I’ll end off with a little side story. I was hanging out at the library last Sunday when I overheard a mother reprimanding her son. Fuming mad, she spoke to her son in Mandarin, “Honey. Mandarin and English are two different spoken languages. When you speak, you don’t mix them together.” Alright. A mother teaching her son to speak in a pure, well-defined manner. Sounds reasonable enough? Of course it does. Until she ended off her speech with…

“Okay?” (In English)

Talk about leading by example?! Comments?

Lesson #1: Don’t Try to be A Guru. Just be Myself.
Truth be told, I got bored with the stuff I was writing. Why? After getting super motivated by all the stuff I was reading, I tried to become a personal development guru myself. Did it unknowingly though. I thought I’ll kick off my blog with some articles that will help others who feel lost about their lives to pick themselves up. Didn’t regret doing that. But I got lost myself by trying to position myself as an expert.

Guess I’m better off just being myself! In future, I will see myself as a learner and share with you guys on how applying the concepts taught in the books help to improve my life!

Lesson #2: Enjoying the Things I Do
I’ve talked a lot about passion and how one can succeed by doing what he or she loves. And then I make the mistake of not doing what I preach. Arghhhhhhh. What I needed in my articles was some room to display my creativity. I’ve always loved to do things that impress others. Guess I’ll need to get my mojo back.

Lesson #3: Stop and Get Myself Organized
Hmmm… I think I was doing too many things at the same time. I probably thought I was Dr. Octopus. Teaching tuition on Wed evening, Sat and Sun mornings. Participating in public music performances. Meeting my buddy to practise the songs for the performances. Watching too much Youtube and online manga. Keeping up with my job. Man… I’ll be burned even if I have eight limbs. STOP. Reorganize. Get my priorities right. Yeah. That’s what I’ll do for now.

Lesson #4: I Was Wasting Time on the Low Value Stuff
Finding public domain pictures on the Internet. Brainstorming content that I intended to teach (Yeah… the “I-am-a-personal-development-guru” syndrome). Finding references on the Internet. Hmmm… Got to find a way to tackle these activities. Either I eliminate it, do less of it, find a system to make it simpler for me, or get someone to help me out.

What’s Next?
I’ll need to get my mojo back. And I’ll need to get my engine up and running again. This time, making sure that I’m enjoying every moment of blogging.

The Meaning Behind a Praise
When you are given a praise, it can only mean one of the following…

How to Praise Someone
Praising someone is pretty simple actually. Let it come from your heart. A praise is nothing more than a set of heartfelt words delivered to show someone your appreciation or admiration. It’s different from flattery, which is usually excessive, intentional and unnatural. We don’t praise others “on purpose” just to get into his or her good books.

Why You Should Praise Others
So that others will praise you?! Haha. Nahhhh. That’s not the reason. These are some of the things a little praise can do for you:

I used to be stingy with praises. Whenever somebody asked me for an opinion, I always responded with something like, “Not bad.” “Nice.” “It’s pretty.” And never like, “This is the work of a genius!” “You handled the situation like a pro!!” I was afraid that unnecessary praises will only make them proud and overconfident. Nowadays, I try not to sink into that kind of mindset. Sometimes, all a person needs is a little praise to keep him or her drive going. It defines meaning to their work.

 
Why not pick up praising as your new hobby?

By the time you really stepped out, you start to get nervous. No one’s there to take you by your hand. You are really on your own now.

“As We Go On We Remember, All The Times We Had Together…”
Sounds familiar? This is the Graduation Song by Vitamin C. Read into the lyrics, and if you are the sentimental kind, I bet you’ll get all emotional.

An Exciting Life Ahead?
Don’t get too comfortable. At this phase of your life, you probably have a few things to think about. Like where you should be going for your graduation trip. Just kidding. It’s beyond that. Something like…

I’m not suggesting that you should turn into a worry freak. With proper planning, it’ll save you from all the unnecessary woes you may have in the future.

Let me leave you with an excerpt of a commencement address delivered by Steve Jobs at Stanford University, June 12, 2005:

“Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.” 
– Steve Jobs

It Doesn’t Have to Be Like That!
His words awakened me. I still remember his first few words of wisdom went like this:

I was just randomly browsing through some books in the library one day when I came across this.
Those thought-provoking first few pages really impressed me. Then, I got wary. Is he another so-called expert my friends were telling me about? Hmm… National bestseller? Can’t be that bad right? Half skeptical and half curious, I read on.

We All Have the Same Hardware? 
Adam starts with the premise that we all have basically the same neurological make-up. Then came his epic question-of-the-day:

And his answer – the key to those differences lies in the behaviors and habits that get installed while we grow up! Most people are not exactly brought up with a winning mindset. And unfortunately, the same people never question what they do and never change their habits. It probably never occurs to them that they could! But of course we CAN change habits, behaviors and beliefs by stimulating our brains in the right way and creating new mental patterns.

The technology Adam uses to reprogram the mind is NLP, i.e., Neuro-linguistic Programming, which has proven to be highly effective at that task. And after carefully reading it, I found that Master Your Mind is not just another book on NLP, useful as that may be, but it goes waaayyy beyond that.

What Attracted Me Was…
The comprehensive, thorough, and easy-to-follow description of the actual techniques that are necessary to accomplish that goal. And it doesn’t stop there. This book is also an extensive workbook that helps the reader to put all those techniques to use right away! Thirdly, it offers a wealth of inspiring examples.

In fact, this book was the only reason why I started this blog. It really changed my perspective of life. So I’ll recommend it to anybody.

From an Under-achiever to Millionaire By Age 26!!!
Adam Khoo himself is a case in point. Starting out as an academically weak student at the very bottom of the pile, he used some of those very strategies he teaches here to reprogram himself and turn himself into a top student. Unlike his fellow students who were satisfied with a normal career path and income upon graduation, he set himself the goal to become a millionaire by age 26 – and achieved it.

He started his first business while still in high school, and several more while in college, and he even became a best-selling author with his book on how to become an excellent student. He developed a program called Patterns of Excellence that he used to teach others to re-pattern their mind to achieve success as well. Quite an inspiration indeed!

From the outset, Adam urges us to have the right mindset. Which I later on adopted as one of my core beliefs. And one of the key parts of that mindset is planning for success by setting specific goals, developing strategies to achieve those goals, and putting them into action!

You Too Can Empower Yourself By Having the Right Mindset
From his book, you can…

And the Drawbacks?
This book is really not for whiners but for people who are prepared to do serious work on themselves. And with that in mind, each chapter also requires you to follow through the exercises and action questions to be effective in helping you master your mind. If you used to copy your buddy’s notes in school, I’m sorry. Not this time. This is something you’ll have to do yourself.

Also, with its 364 pages, it seems kind of long for an e-book, and it may be a bit of a pain to read on the small screen of your i-book. But it is so worth it that you probably won’t mind anymore once you get into it. Besides, with the upcoming e-book readers or i-books with larger screens, this wouldn’t be an issue anyway. And, of course, you can always print it out or read on your computer!

Take caution too. He’s an action-oriented person. And his words will coerce you into taking some form of action. It’s that powerful. There’s no escape. On a lighter note, it’s nothing like how our parents like to nag at us. Don’t worry.

So, what’s your take? Trade that pair of movie tickets for a life-changing book… or continue dreaming?

Yes! I want to TAKE ACTION NOW!!!

B-A-A-mazing Notes from the Blogger:
About 80% of people who buy books (or e-books) do not finish reading it. Out of the remaining 20% who do, about 25% actually act on it. Simply put, if 10,000 people were to buy a book, only 500 of them will complete it and put what they learned into practice! Are you among that 500?

Time investment. This term really needs to be popularized. I’ve lived with a strong belief in the concept of time management since middle school. And I hate to admit that it’s really just a myth!

Time Investment vs Time Management
So what’s the difference between the two? Why make such a big fuss? Here’s a table to illustrate this:

The greatest difference between the two is really the way you view time! As with all investment concepts, time investment emphasizes the returns from investing your time in your activities.

What’s Your Going Rate?
Concepts are always best taught with examples. The following example will give you an idea of what I’m saying.

Consider employees A and B. Employee A earns $7000 per month. Employee B earns $10000 per month. Looking at their monthly salaries, it’s obvious that Employee B commands a higher pay. What if I told you that Employee A works 40 hours per week while Employee B slogs for 66 hours per week?

Based on a four-week month,

Now, who commands a higher hourly rate? One of the key concepts of time investment is about putting in rewarding hours like Employee A.

Of course, it isn’t always centered about money. Before I ruin your understanding of the topic, how about letting Todd Duncan do the teaching? Check out his New York Times bestseller – Time Traps: Proven Strategies for Swamped Professionals NOW!

How This Book is Going to Change Your Life?

This Book is NOT For…

B-A-A-mazing Notes from the Blogger:
You should really start to keep a mini personal library for yourself. Books are your assets. One puny book can often offer you mind-blowing concepts that will benefit you for life.

That’s when you know that skipping that one movie for the book was really worth it.

Must-Have Skill #1: Communication
Good communication skills are vital for your survival! The top on your list! And the best part is, you don’t have to be a professional salesperson or a sweet talker to communicate well. Anyone can and MUST learn to communicate. The benefits?

And many many more!

Must-Have Skill #2: Selling
Selling is a subset of communication skills. Because it is so important, I thought I should dedicate a small section for it to be elaborated upon. Selling is only for salespeople? That’s a myth! Whether you are doing it consciously or not, you are constantly selling in your life!

You sell yourself to your family and friends as a happy-go-lucky person. You sell yourself at the last job interview you had. At your workplace, you sell yourself as a responsible and capable leader. As a boss, you sell yourself as someone who values the well-being of your employees as much as the profits. More selling for you if you are a salesperson.

Still think it’s not part of your life?

Must-Have Skill #3: Time Investment
Time investment? Do I mean time management? Nope! Just as I wrote. And I’ll let you in on another one of my discoveries. Time management is a myth! After all, time is an “unmanageable and continuous” resource (see: Wikipedia). Activities can be managed. But not time.

The term “time investment” also delivers a change in attitude to the way we view time. When we see time as a resource to be invested, we become concerned with the returns that it yields, won’t we? That’s exactly what we need!!! The efficient and productive use of our time!

Must-Have Skill #4: Learning
One of my greatest realization after I started indulging in personal development books is that I’m not skilled in learning after all! I’m not joking. Whole brain learning techniques, speed-reading, mind-mapping, memory improvement techniques, neuro-linguistic programming and Suggestopedia, what a wide array of learning tools I have been missing out on throughout my schooling years! Still, it’s better late than never.

Must-Have Skill #5: Emotional Control 
Motivation, passion and determination, what do they all have in common? They are all guided by emotions. Ever heard of the book “Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ” by Daniel Goleman? You should check it out. It’s a national bestseller for a reason.

I’ve touched on the topic of emotions before (see: 1, 2), so I won’t be doing it again. What I’ll like to emphasize is this – master your emotions, and you master your own destiny!

Coming Up Next…
I’ll be elaborating more on time investment in my next article. What are your views on this article? Leave a comment below.

Take-Away of this Article:
The five must-have skills you should be equipped with are communication, selling, time investment, learning and emotional control.

Start working on them if you find yourself lacking in one of these areas!

The Three Essential Steps

Step 1: Name at least two good things each about your personality, habits, behaviour, beliefs, values and skills

The good things about you doesn’t have to be on an astronomical scale. You don’t have to be a philanthropist or a two-time kidney donor. Wait a minute. A two-time donor? Oh never mind. Anyway, smaller deeds, like giving up your seat to the elderly counts too!

Step 2: Verify with your family and close friends

Self-explanatory I guess. Have a HTHT session with them! (HTHT = heart-to-heart talk. Some well-known acronym that we use in Singapore).

Step 3: Decide for yourself. What are your strong points? How will they help in driving you towards your desired goals?

Sounds like the exact steps I wrote on identifying your weaknesses. One thing to note here though…

What You Are Good At ≠ What You Like!
True? I have a tutee who’s skilled at drawing (I give part-time tuition remember?). But only because her mum had forced her to take up art lessons when she was younger. After years of practice, she became skilled at it. In truth, she hates drawing. So don’t confuse the things you are proficient in with your true passion.

This is So Much Easier with Mind-Maps
If you have been following my posts for some time already, you should have a personal mind-map that looks like that:

 
Your strengths can be found anywhere in your mind-map. Circle them in red (see above)! Are they in line with your passion and goals? Feel free to add a new sub-topic on your strengths.

The New Generation
Times are changing. People are changing. It’s the Information Age. An age whereby nothing seems impossible. You don’t need the good looks of Brad Pitts or Megan Fox to be rich and famous. Susan Boyle did it. A Taiwanese singer, Lin Yu Chun, dubbed by many news sources as “Taiwan’s Susan Boyle”, gained fame recently and even had a chance to perform at The Ellen Degeneres Show in April this year. Call him cute? Maybe. But I wouldn’t say it’s good looks that got him there.

Geeks used to be a total turnoff. But I see many rise to stardom now. Another famous singer from Taiwan, Lu Guang Zong, bears a mushroom head and still command loud cheering from the crowd.

Slowly getting my point ya? With a little creativity, you can turn your significant strengths into a respectable career. Think you have the loudest burp? Go join the Guinness Book of Records! Think you are a humorous geek? Go start a Facebook group on geeky humour. And sell geeky T-shirts.

Who knows? You might just start the next hot trend. Á la vôtre!

Even the Rich and Famous Once Fell Prey
From ancient times, strategists exploited their enemies’ weaknesses to turn the tide of the war. People sabotaged each other to climb the power ladder. Your weakness is like an open wound, inviting the unwelcomed to feast on it.

Even some of the rich and famous, at one time, fell victim to their own weaknesses. Tiger Woods, a first-rate American professional golfer, went through a major blue period in both his life and career due to last winter’s sex scandal. The Lewinsky scandal also put former US president, Bill Clinton, through a similar ordeal. Antwon Tanner, the One Hill Tree star, was given a prison sentence for selling 3 fake social security cards and 16 social security numbers for a mere $10,000.

Can you identify the traits that have caused them inconveniences in their lives?

Identify Your Weaknesses
For a start, do a quick self evaluation. Be honest because you are doing this for yourself. Name at least two bad things about your…

Say you’ve done up your list of bad qualities. The next step is to…

Talk to Your Family & Close Friends! 
WE are often blind to our own weaknesses. Your loved ones can tell you better. I once told a female friend of mine that she talks really loudly. She was like, “WHAT? I DIDN’T REALIZE UNTIL YOU TOLD ME!” Oh well. Fortunately I did.

A word of caution – find someone you are absolutely comfortable with to discuss this. The last thing I’ll like to see is a bunch of comments at the bottom telling me how you punched your best friend or fell out with your sister.

It’s easy for things to get personal. Especially when your best friend starts to rant about how you ruined the birthday surprise he painstakingly planned for his girlfriend because you were such a blabbermouth. Remain objective and consider their viewpoints about you from a third person perspective. Don’t bother to defend yourself. You’ll waste your precious time arguing your case instead of considering the other person’s viewpoint. Just take down what he or she says and move on.

It’s definitely worthwhile talking to your loved ones. Treat it as a bonding session. You might be in for a surprise too. Sometimes, the traits you view as your weaknesses might turn out to be your strongest points to them!

Make Your Own Decision
You heard me. You heard yourself. You heard what others got to say about you. Now, because you know yourself the best, you should decide on which one of your weaknesses are the most critical and are hindering your success. List down your top three, and start working on them, one at a time. It takes some determination and a strong desire to change. Don’t expect a complete overhaul immediately.

If you can’t decide, ask yourself just one simple question,

“Which one of your weaknesses will be costly to your true goals in life?”

A Word From the Author
Hope that all these talk didn’t cause you to falter or become depressed. If you did, you should…

… stare at this picture for 10 seconds.

Instead, be VERY proud. It takes a lot of courage to face your own weaknesses. Kudos to you, brave one!