Write a Goodbye Letter to Yourself
The sub-heading spells it all. Bid goodbye to the old you! Time to put all that you’ve learned from the series (“Secret Recipe for the Lost”) into action. A few IMPORTANT points to take note before you try this exercise:

Why are these so important? Well, if you followed through my posts from Day One, you’ll realize that they are all about mindset. Pick up ANY national bestseller about achieving success in various fields (e.g. business, investing, personal development) and the first thing the author tries to do is to draw the reader into the right mental state.

Conclusion? Getting into the right mindset is crucial to achieving success in whatever you do!!!

The Contents of the Letter
In the letter, write down the things you want to say goodbye to. It can be everything that you dislike about yourself currently. Here are some other points for you to consider:

At the end of the letter, write down what you are expecting out of the new you! Most importantly, state your SPECIFIC goals and the corresponding deadlines.

Use strong and impactful words so that you’ll remember. Need an example? Take a look at this letter: 

It’s not complete but it should given you a rough idea. Remember to set your new goals! Quote the deadlines to achieve them. Then keep the letter somewhere safe and take a look at it from time to time.

This letter will serve as a constant reminder to what you are committed to achieve. And tell your closed friends or family about it! Share with them your new goals and conviction!

And With That…
I thank all of you for spending the time to read my posts. I hope this series has been useful for you and have gotten you into the right frame of mind.

However, this doesn’t end here. Instead, this is just the beginning. I’ll leave you with this quote from Anthony Robbins.

“Success is the result of good judgement. Good judgement is the result of experience. Experience is the result of bad judgement.”   – Anthony Robbins

The Seven Steps to Basic Cooking?
It’s funny to talk about recipes if you know nuts about cooking. Hence, for the benefit of those who aren’t familiar with cooking, let’s go through some of the basic steps.

Step 1: Know what to cook.

Go grab a recipe book! Pick a kind of dish that you fancy! Be it Asian, Italian, Mediterranean, Spanish or French cuisine, know what you want! Discover your purpose. Then pick something you are passionate about and get cracking!

“Now, how do I make that Parsnip Pie?” 

Step 2: Gather your ingredients.

Ahhhhh… yes! Pick a few values. Get a 100 grams of beliefs. And don’t forget the two tea spoons of emotions. No more, no less.   

“A little values, a few pinch of beliefs …”

Step 3: Wash. Clean. Marinate.

Wash away your negative thoughts. Clean up your limiting beliefs. Get rid of the bad parts. Then marinate the rest with some empowering beliefs. Something along the lines of, “I’m a master-chef-wanna-be and I’m going to whip up a meal so good you’ll be crying for seconds!” Then set a goal for yourself. How many thumbs up will you like to have after others tasted your dish?

Wash! Wash! Wash!

Step 4: Preheat!

Experienced cooks always prepare the wok for cooking by heating it up a little. Just like how you’ll need to ensure that you are adequately equipped with the knowledge and skills to achieve your goal – realizing your recipe!

Preheat!

Step 5: Follow your recipe and start cooking!

A recipe is like a strategy. A plan. A roadmap laid by others before you. Model after them. You have gotten all that you need. Time to start cooking! Learn from the process. Improve your knowledge and skills. And learn to execute it correctly. Otherwise, a recipe is just some words put on paper.

Yummy!

Step 6: Keep failing until you get it right.

Who always gets it right the first time? Never stop trying, even if the dish that you painstakingly whipped up caused everyone to frown!!! Find out what went wrong! Note it down! Then repeat Steps 2 to 5 while keeping your mistakes in mind. Keep doing that, improving on your strategy each time, until you succeed.

Need some inspiration?

Image taken from Veritas, Volume 4

Well said Gangryoung! (FYI, Veritas is a Korean manhwa – a type of comics.)  

Step 7: Create your ultimate success recipe.

Once you have succeeded enough times, it’s time to formulate your very own success blueprint. It will sum up all your experiences, be it failure or success. It will be a refined masterpiece, thanks to your unrelenting, numerous attempts. MOST importantly, it will bear your own unique taste to it!

 Create your own recipe!

And there we have it. The 7 important steps to creating your ultimate success recipe. Courtesy of TheLostOne.com. Inspired by Adam’s book, “Master Your Mind, Design Your Destiny”.

Ermmm… You didn’t really think I’ll teach you how to cook did you?

P.S. If you read through all the posts of this series, you will get a better picture of what I’m saying.

P.P.S. Apply this ultimate success recipe in your everyday life and start noticing the changes to your life – for the better!

It’s group change. Group change is defined as the ability to influence the people closest to you, be it your family or friends, into adopting your way of thinking (see: TheLostopedia). Can’t find that on Google?  Me neither. I sort of faked that. It was a sudden inspiration. Maybe I read it somewhere. But you got my point huh?

“The ones closest to you can make or break you.”  – Anonymous

Your Type of Company
Birds of a feather flock together. Very true indeed! Everyone likes to hang out with people that share his or her common interests. As much as you enjoy the company of your close ones, you are exposed to their thoughts every day. Soon enough, you find yourself adopting their values and beliefs!

Is the Earth Flat or Round?
Popular beliefs aren’t always true. People of the Middle Ages used to think that the Earth was flat. Until someone proved it otherwise. Ever tried telling your loved ones your dreams one day, only to receive feedbacks like, “You must be crazy!” “Go get a DECENT job”. Or… “Dreams can’t fill your stomach.”

Don’t be disheartened! Instead, you should …

Welcome Them to Your World!
Successful people see solutions when others see problems. You might have been exposed to new values and beliefs that are taught to you. However, your friends and family HAVEN’T! Hence, they do not see eye to eye with you.

Unless you are satisfied with a monotonous life deprived of important decisions and brave attempts, don’t stop here! Welcome them to your world! Show them the possibilities. Inspire them! Instead of being influenced by them, why not YOU influence THEM? After all, if you want to succeed, don’t be selfish. Why not help them as well? Group change! Remember?

What Others Suggest
Many authors have touched on this issue – the influence of your family and friends. Some have suggested becoming selective about your friends. And mixing with the same type of people (e.g. those interested in success). Heard of Mastermind groups?

Well, I agree with the latter. But I don’t think you must be selective about your friends. Your buddies might not have the traits of successful men. However, they might be supporting you emotionally or spiritually.

At the end of the post, just remember this:

“Influence the people closest to you into adopting the success principles you learned, and you’ll find yourself closer to your dreams in no time.” 
– TheLostOne.com

This is a Thai commercial ad for Pantene, a shampoo brand. Extremely touching isn’t it? The part at 0:57 really hit my soft spot! The girl was crying and the old man asked her (using sign language), “Why do you have to be like others?” Awwww,,, plus the defiant pose of the young girl on the stage at the last part!

Plus… I simply LOVE Canon in D! Two thumbs up!

Winning With Emotions
Humans are emotional creatures. Understanding emotions can certainly help you win the hearts of many and work yourself towards success! These are a few examples.

1) Advertisements
Smart advertisers always incorporate emotions into their advertisements. They toy with your feelings, attack your ego, work around your fears, frustrate you, inspire you or even touch your hearts! 

These emotional triggers are what prompt people to BUY. They buy the idea that the advertised brand is a good brand. And if they are so convinced, they’ll even buy the products! From advertisements to sales letters, emotional marketing is used everywhere!

“Just do it alright. LOL.”

2) Stock Markets
Apart from being good with numbers, financial statements and having a high financial intelligence, a good investor must learn to control his or her emotions.

An average investor has a tendency to buy stocks that are overvalued because of a tip-off from a friend or sell stocks that are undervalued out of fear when everyone is selling. Decisions made based on emotions tend to lead them to incur losses.

A savvy investor bases his investment decisions on rationale and keen analysis. The ONLY time they are emotional is when they get their returns. Woohoo!

3) Your Workplace
Successful bosses or employees often establish a rapport with co-workers. They understand their colleagues well. And they form a strong bond with one another.

Love or gratitude for the company makes people stay and go the extra mile. I have a colleague who stayed with a company for six years until he couldn’t take it anymore because the company paid for his mum’s medical expenses previously (for chemotherapy).

Trust builds a healthy working environment. Mutual respect builds healthy relationships between co-workers.

Before We End…
Keep in mind what I’ve just talked about. And here’s something to think about, “Is it time for you to sharpen your edge?”

The Birth of Your Greatest Fears
Welcome to the Dark Side. Having emotions causes us to have fears. Here’s a general list of things that we fear:

Having too many fears in our hearts often hold us back and impede our growth. Excessive fear causes us…

Yet, successful people often have to take on calculated risks! People like Warren Buffett, Bill Gates, Walt Disney, Donald Trumps, Oprah Winfrey and Steve Jobs took on countless risks in their lives before they succeeded!

When Our Fears Turn On Us…
Take a look at these scenarios and how your fears can possibly bring you down.

Of course…

Having Fears Isn’t Always Bad!
I’ve read many self-help books. And most authors often emphasize the negative impacts of having fears. In their perspective, they presume that YOU are reading the book because you are some fearful individual. Recommend the same book to some fearless individual and you’ll see him running straight into pitfalls without giving much thought.

Welcome to the Light. Having fears isn’t always that bad. But the key word here is moderation. Having a little fear can benefit us by…

The Moral of The Story…
Here’s the bottom line. And I’m probably the first to tell you this – keep your daily dosage of fears SMALL. Most people will tell you to get rid of them. I’ll say you keep some, so that you’ll retain the ability to protect yourself!

Leave your comments below…

A)	Tell him/her you have no weaknesses.
B)	Try coughing up some crappy methods that you just thought of.
C)	OR read my post and rock your interview

If you chose A, you’re screwed. If you chose B, you are just as screwed. If you chose option C, read on my friend! Presenting to you, ten solid ways to overcoming your weaknesses! Enjoy…

#1. Use a reminder card (about 8.6cm by 5.4cm) Sounds familiar? (I used this in one of my other posts.) Notice that the dimension’s the size of a credit card, so you can slot it in your wallet easily. Write down three methods you are using to get rid of your weaknesses on the card. If you dislike words, replace them with pictures. Whenever your weakness sets in, take a breather, pick up the card as a reminder and put what you wrote into practice.

#2. Get your loved ones involved Ask your loved ones for help. Whenever you make the same mistake, they’ll be there to correct you. Simple yet effective. And since you promised to change, you won’t lie to them, will you?

#3. Minify the noise in your head! Notice how helpless we become when faced with our weaknesses? Say you are always nervous before a stage performance. You’re likely to magnify your negative thoughts by several times. Suddenly, the audience seems so big and frightening. The stage becomes cold and uninviting. You entertain yourself with the fear of performing badly in front of your friends. STOP! Don’t do that. Instead, treat all these as noise to you. Like the sound of a broken record. Turn down its volume. Watch the sheer size of the audience shrink in your head. Picture a lively stage with beautiful decorations. Tell yourself you are going out there to impress your friends. Now prove to them you can do it!

#4. Break your state! Whenever I start to feel sleepy at work, instead of allowing myself to doze off, I’ll quickly get up from my seat and start doing my work while standing. This breaks my sleepy state! Also, colleagues who pass by my cubicle will start questioning my weird behaviour. To avoid embarrassing myself further, my mind chooses to be awake automatically. The end.

#5. Tell your nemesis Absurd as it sounds, it’s highly likely that your overpowering ego to prove to your nemesis that you can change will make it a reality. Á la vôtre!

#6. Be creative and fun  We lose interest easily when things get monotonous. The same thing with your methods. Always ensure that they are unconventional and FUN! I have a friend who uses “rock, scissors and paper” to make decisions. Childish? Maybe. Effective? DEFINITELY! At least to her.

#7. Be sure WHO you are doing this for There’s got to be someone you are changing for. It can be your family, your friends, or even yourself! Whenever you succumb to your weakness, tell yourself this, “I’m doing this for ____!” Way to go buddy!

#8. Support your actions with your values and beliefs Say you are a trustworthy person. And your weakness is that you are indecisive. Make a promise to someone whom you see often about your intended change. Put in a wager if you have to. Give yourself a deadline. Install a new belief that you are a decisive person. For every occasion that you snap out of your indecisiveness, record it down. When you reach your deadline, ask him or her to assess how well you faired.

#9. Replace it with an alternative behaviour This is self-explanatory. Say you bite your nails often whenever you are experience stage-fright. The next time you feel nervous, behave differently. How about taking a deep breath and think of the times when you felt confident instead?

#10. From inaction to IN-ACTION. All else fails when you fall victim to inaction – the “all-talk-no-action” phenomenon. And the remedy is simple. Create a new habit. The habit of not putting off important things for later. Now you’re in action.

Well. All good things come to an end. Catch ya later…

The Step-by-Step Guide
You have learned to identify your weaknesses. Get rid of them then! Here are five steps that work well for me.

Step 1: Pick ONE weakness you want to change.

Humans don’t do well when they try to cramp too many things at one go. Unless you bear the letter ‘S’ on your chest, you’re better off focusing on one at a time.

Step 2: Pick out the roots.

Weeds grow back easily unless they are removed together with the roots. Same principle here. Find the root cause for your weakness(es). Here’s a table to illustrate my point.

Usually, there may be more than one root cause. You might be biting your nails often because you don’t have a nail-clipper at home! Sounds retarded? Yes. But it happens.

Step 3: Find the need for the change.

List down your reasons for changing. Some questions to consider while brainstorming are as follows:

If you know one reason doesn’t make you feel strongly about it, come out with five! Ten! Or even twenty! Stop when you understand that it hurts to do nothing.

Step 4: Find the solution for each root cause. Then take massive, focused action for 30 days.

This is where we get creative. And there’s a whole bunch of stuff to elaborate on. I’ll be doing it in a separate post.

Step 5: Monitor yourself periodically.

Checking on your progress makes sense doesn’t it? Do it in an incremental fashion. From once a week, to fortnightly, then to monthly, bi-monthly etc. Do that until you finally get rid of it.

Take Action Now!
Don’t wait. Apply these steps now! Tried them and it works for you? Leave a comment. Tell me about it. Think this is all bullshit and I’m wasting your time? Leave me a comment too and teach me how!

P.S. Check out “Tips for Breaking Bad Habits and Developing Good Habits” for other interesting ways to kick your bad habits.